The Greyhound

Having travelled 2,500 miles on the Greyhound bus in America, Ben Collins reveals what this most legendary form of transport is really like

Famed for being the traveller’s choice of travel, taking the Greyhound it seems is as much a must-do activity as the Golden Gate, the London Eye or the Eiffel Tower. But what is this most recognised form of travel really like...?

...Well in a nutshell it is what you expect – cheap, dirty and inefficient. However, given you can travel 1,000km for less than $80/£50 I guess you could argue that you get what you pay for.

So the first thing you will notice about Greyhound is their customer service, which put simply has room for improvement. From sales to security to the drivers themselves, the Greyhound staff are rude, unfriendly and at times blatantly aggressive. In fact, I would go as far to say that I have never before in my life come across a company which so universally accepts such a piss-poor level of service.
The service is impersonal, the security is lax, the journey is slow and the passengers are just awful
Then there is the security, which once more is lacking. Whilst they may have security guards in all of their terminals these individuals it seem could barely secure their own shoelaces, let alone a possible or active threat. With inconsistent questioning, no thorough searches and a general sense of lethargy, these security guards are not only a waste of money but they are so incredibly and blatantly ineffective at their jobs they leave you feeling more at risk than if they weren't there in the first place.

Then finally, there is the bus itself, which is out of date, terribly uncomfortable and above all – slow. Worst of all though is the toilet, which lurking at the back of the bus, smells like a coach load of people died in there on a hot summer’s day. Trust me... if you ever ride the Greyhound, sit at the front.
As much as this service lacks in almost everything you expect from a coach trip, the Greyhound was somehow still everything I had secretly hoped for
So yeah, I think in conclusion we can say that the Greyhound could be doing a little bit better for itself but as much as I complain, it hasn't stopped me from clocking up nearly two and a half thousand miles on their network so in fairness to the Greyhound, it surely can’t be that bad. What am I saying? I mean of course it is that bad, but it beats walking, right!?